2012 Grad Keynote Address
By Connor Ferrie
As Wes mentioned, I am giving the keynote address. Now, traditionally, this address has been given by, a teacher who has taught the class, or an older community member that knows the class. However, this year our class decided to do something different in that they asked me to give the address. They said they thought I would be funny, and that by being in the class I could share a more in-depth journey of how we got to be where we are today, also everyone else we asked said no. So I am here, sorry. Our class’s motto is “We Remember It Like It Was Yesterday”. This is very fitting because when I think back it does only seem like just yesterday we were on the playground. So I would like to take you now on a journey through space and time.
It all started in Kindergarten: The year, 1999, the place Coronach School. Now if you asked people in our class about what they remember from Kindergarten probably about 90% of all the memories would be about the rice table. Now for those of you who don’t know what the rice table was. It was this table…that was filled with rice, and you would take a scoop or a bucket and scoop up the rice, and then pour it back into the table. It was hours of fun. Of course, the other 10% of our memories of Kindergarten were of getting the rice out of your hair. Because you can only dump rice in the table for so long, until you decide that there might be a more fun place to dump it. Back in Kindergarten we also had beanie bags, a plush faceless object, so it was obviously meant to thrown at people. We had large-scale wars that used military tactics, which would not be thought of again, until we learned them in high school history.
Of course childish beanie bag wars can only carry on for so long. That is why in grade two, we upgraded to staplers. However, we were not just some angry, violent class of misbehaving children. We were an angry, violent class of misbehaving children, with feelings. We were not with out heart. In fact we were very ahead of our age in showing emotion. We got over the cooties stage very early. In fact, in grade two, Kayla and Curtis got married. It was a beautiful wedding, and their marriage lasted a good solid…week. That’s right we were having weeklong marriages before it was cool! Your move celebrity world! Now in grade two we had Mrs. Gold, who was probably one of nicest teachers ever. Which is why, of course we had to prank her. And that job fell to Dylan, who hid underneath Mrs. Gold’s desk until she sat down, which is when Dylan grabbed the height adjuster on the chair and Mrs. Gold came flying down to the ground. She laughed louder than anyone else in the room. We also had show and tell, which I know Sam enjoyed, because she got more time to talk. Seriously though, I don’t think our class ever minds when Sam gets a bit talkative, because she always has something interesting or kind to say.
Now Coronach is very much a farming community. So just like the rest of the community, when fall came around it was time for harvest on the playground. All of the leaves would fall and it would be our job to harvest them. Everyone had a job. There would be people combining, people swathing, and people being grain trucks and running the leaves to the bin, or in our case, giant pile of leaves. However, perhaps one of the most important people in this whole operation was Nikki, who would record the yield and post projections for the next year’s leaf crop. Then at the end of the day we would all jump into the pile of leaves, which was great fun. Until, overnight all the stray cats came and used the pile as a litter box. Then jumping in the pile the next day, wasn’t as much fun.
I think most of us enjoyed our elementary years. We laughed, we cried, we laughed at teachers when they cried. That last part is actually true, Mrs. Thue, our grade four teacher started crying during Old Yeller, and we just laughed at her. We were twisted! And before we ventured into our middle years, we had grade five. In Grade five we welcomed a new student to our school, Garret Pifko, or Garret P or Piffy or P dog or Pifed. I just made the last two up, but the point is that he joined our class in grade five. When he joined I was assigned to buddy up with him. As with any other new kid all the other classmates crowded around to see him. I told Garret that they usually did this. That is when Larissa promptly put me in my place, by instructing me that, “they wanted to see the new kid too!”
Now in grade five, our class learned a lot. You see our teacher, Mrs. Giraudier, had “the naughty book,” and if you misbehaved you had to write in the book and it would be shown to your parents. Our class learned a lot from that book, like to erase your previous entries, while you wrote your latest one.
This of course brings us to the middle years. Now not a lot of people enjoy the middle years as much as elementary or high school. But, things happened then and it would be unfair, not to mention them. I am pretty sure we watched a movie at some point.
So High School, many interesting events have transpired over these past few years. We were like a fine wine, we grew older and matured, and spent large portions of time in other people’s refrigerators and basements. We have learned a lot about each other and perhaps even what each other’s futures may hold over these past few years. They say that high school separates the boys from the men but at least a lap or two has always separated us from Jordan. Because, Jordan can outrun everyone in the class. High school also taught us life skills like cooking in Home Ec., or in Colton’s case: how to make a slip in slide using only large amounts of oil and a waxed floor.
Speaking of Home Ec., we also learned survival skills, like packing enough food. However, this was never a lesson that Wesley had to be taught as he has what is known as the never-ending bunny hug of food. He has a veritable all you can eat buffet with him at all times! I once saw Wesley take a can of cream cheese icing out of his bunny hug and eat it with a spoon! However, Wes was not the only one to have a seemingly endless supply of something. For you see, there is Justin: 75% man 25% Coke Products. I am pretty sure that at one point Justin had an average of 5 Cokes a day!
In Coronach, High school really starts in Grade Nine, and in Grade Nine we got a new student to Coronach School, Rebecca. On one of Rebecca’s first days, our class was being generally bad and causing chaos when our English teacher, Miss Rachul, walked in. Now Rebecca had never met Miss Rachul before and it went a little like this. Miss Rachul walked in and said, “Real mature guys! I come back from an nice vacation to this!” At this point Miss Rachul rather loudly slammed the door, only to see Genelle cleaning up some spilled pop. Which is when she said, “Genelle, stop cleaning that up! I know you didn’t do that!” She then turned to see a new face, and said “Oh hi! You must Rebecca! I’m Miss Rachul! If you ever need anything, you just come to me!” Which was not scary or creepy at all.
Now one of the great parts about high school is the group discussions. When I think of our class’ discussions, two people automatically come to mind. Brandon and Jesse. Brandon is not given enough credit for his wonderful contributions to class discussion. He taught us all a very valuable lesson in that if you ask enough questions you will eventually be able to delay the lesson. Jesse often has insightful comments just horribly mistimed. The entire class will be shouting and just as soon as Jesse says something the entire class quiets down and Jesse is given all the blame. I think it takes a lot of patience on Jesse’s part to put up with all of this. However, I think there is one person in our class who has more patience, and that is Kerst…Chris…Kirst…That person. Because pretty much no one in the class has said her name the same way twice in a sentence! You are a truly a patient person KIRSTIN.
Through out our high school years we have done quite a few things worth laughing at and there is always one laugh that you can identify as soon as you hear it, and that is Katelyn’s. She has a great sense of humour. She even laughs at Miss Rachul’s jokes. That’s funny, right? However, High school also doesn’t come without it’s bugging and teasing. One of the people who knows this the best is Ashley. You see the guys have always picked on Ashley. And we all know what it means when boys pick on girls. It means that they are jealous of their hair.
Now in high school everyone got their drivers license and when that happened everyone started getting cars. Now when Carissa got her car, everyone was instantly jealous, because Carissa got one of the coolest cars in the class. Carissa got a Dodge Challenger. Which is second in coolness only to my 2009 Chevrolet Cobalt. I mean, I don’t want to brag, but my cobalt has 16-inch dark grey plastic rims, that spin…if the car is moving.
We have learned so much about each other. We have truly left our mark on this school. I mean that literally, there are several holes around the school that have been left by our class.
I remember sitting in class one day when the teacher left, which immediately meant that you must stop whatever you were doing and erupt in utter chaos. During this ensuing chaos I saw something whiz by my head at lightning speed and then I head a loud bang. People would later tell me that this noise was a pudding cup hitting the wall. But I believe it was the sound of a pudding cup breaking the sound barrier! You see Zach had managed to throw a pudding cup so hard that it literally went into the wall! Now, physics isn’t my best class, but the velocity that a pudding cup has to travel in order to go into a wall…is pretty great! Now I know what you are thinking, where could you possibly go after the feat of embedding a pudding cup into a wall? Desks apparently. We decided a full-scale wall attack was necessary. So our class put a desk into a wall. Now we had learned from our previous “accident” so this time we covered the hole with a piece of paper, which may actually have worked if Garret Foley hadn’t written on the paper “Deal with it Berner”.
So as you can see, we really do remember it like it was yesterday. Now this is usually the part of the speech, where the speaker gives advice to the class on how to make their way through the years to come. But, I am at the same stage you are all at. I can’t see the future. However, I can give you a perspective to look at life with. And that perspective comes from our class. I remember sitting in English class and we were correcting sentences that had been used in text messages, and Miss Rachul said, “How do we end this sentence?” and one of the first answers shouted from our class was, “smiley-face.” Grammatically, it was completely incorrect, but emotionally it was 100% correct. So in life, make every sentence end with smiley-face. Sure every once in a while there is going to be a frowney-face, but you need to push through and get to that smiley-face! Sometimes you are going to get a thumbs down, which is apparently a “n” in brackets, I don’t fully understand that, but you will get to that smiley-face! Sometimes, you might get crazy, and have a winkey-face. That is good too. Sometimes, you are going to give your heart to someone, and they are going to be like, “Why did you give me less than 3?” and you will have to explain to them, that a less than sign and a 3 make a sideways heart. But, most importantly, live every day, with smiley-face. Thank you very much.
Toast to the Guys
by Kayla Krusky, Ashley Strutynski, Larissa Warken and Samantha Elder
Good Evening, The 4 of us decided to take on the task of making the toast to the boys. We would like to start by telling you something special about each individual. Over the 13 years we’ve learnt something special from each and every one of them.
Garrett P.- You always have an opinion on what the right answer is even though we hate to admit it you are usually right.
Colton- You are never afraid to put us in our place, but at the end of the day your charming smile is impossible to stay mad at.
Brandon- Your modest personality and your love of sports is outstanding it shows the character you have and provides strength and confidence in others. And let’s not forget your wheels are no longer squares they are finally turning.
Jordan-You are always there to give us a helping hand in any situation. You’re energetic just like the energizer bunny but soft and cuddly.
Zach –Zach is definitely the sweetheart of the class but his lack of focus keeps everyone laughing, including the teachers. Oh and constantly keeping tabs on Miss. Rachuls love life.
Connor-You show true confidence and courage and what it takes to show true honestly to yourself and others. You’re an inspiration, and you’ve shown us what laughter is especially your fashion advice to Zach on socks and sandals.
Garrett F. - You can charm your way out of almost everything good and bad. You will miss us helping you control your weight by attempting to steal your lunch.
Jesse- So happy you joined us today, thought you’d be busy seeding. You look like the guy no one would want to mess with but deep down your our big cuddly teddy bear.
Kelsey- To know him was to love him; his unique personality and smile are unforgettable. We remember him with a coke and his precious dimples lighting up the room. With a passion for farming and love for his friends, he was an outstanding young man. Kelsey has inspired us in the past and has left footprints on our hearts for our future.
Dylan-We have to say your ability to hold yourself in such high esteem will bring you success in life. We’re going to miss modeling of all your new clothing and telling you how good your butt looks.
Justin- You’ve always been known for the big loud trucks, we always know when you’re skipping because we can hear you ripping up the back alley.
Curtis- is by far the most rambunctious person we know. He cannot sit still especially when he wears those cowboy boots and during chemistry. But he’d be there for all of us in a heartbeat.
Wesley- You do know we are in grade 12 and we no longer have nap time right? You’ve always gave us something to laugh about.
No matter what you’ve put us through we still love you. From marker fights, to army soccer, let’s not forget flaming Kleenex boxes, 2 foot high fires in the chem lab, grade two weddings and grade five divorces, drummer boy at the 4 corners, boys catch girls never girls catch boys, air bands, paint fights, sneaking out after curfew, backroading, smoking behind the kinsmen park hill, and finally after all these years we are now realizing we’ve been best friends no matter what has happened. The boys have gone from young kids combining leaves in the playground to grown boys spending hours together in the field. We’ve been through thick and thin together and everything that has happened has made us the strong individuals we are today. Our class has gone from 23 strangers to a family who can get through anything. Now we would like to ask you to join us in a toast to the graduating boys of 2012.
Toast to the Girls
By Curtis Noll, Brandon Knudson and Dylan Mack
We feel so honoured to be up here toasting you girls today. We feel equally as blessed to have been able to grow up beside you for the last 13 years.
And with a little help from Miss. Rachul, it isn’t ALL about trucks and combines….
Kayla - always has the BEST lunches, and is well known for her… uhh obsession for the colour yellow
Nikki—Nikki, my darling….if it wasn’t for you…me and the other half of our class wouldn’t be here today without your help
Genelle—Negative Nelly…,.we love to bug you, but we don’t know one person who is more helpful and caring than you are.
Ashley – we could go on for hours, but you made a good point when you said “don’t embarrass Brent” so we will give you what you wanted, we love ya!
Carissa—we like to think that we have taught each of you girls a thing or 2 about driving, but you have proven time and time again that we have not
Larissa—you are one of the few girls who can actually relate to our farming talks but sometimes, we agree with you just to make you feel better
Rebecca – The Grade 12’s and I would like to congratulate you on being the only graduating female still left in gym class
Sam—we do not know how we will function next year without your opinion on EVERYTHING we do…so we wanted to share OUR opinion with you…good on ya for coming out of the house after the wedding…
Kirstin—You are one of the only girls who can keep up with us guys…we appreciate your good effort
Katelyn– We know we are great at getting under your skin, but no matter how annoying we are, we can always make you smile.
It has been said that people bug the ones they love, and that is so true in our case. We truly do love each and every one of you and we feel so lucky to have been able to grow up with you.
Will you please join us in toasting “our girls”.
Toast to the Parents
by Garrett Foley
On behalf of the class of 2012, I have been given the honor of giving the toast to the parents.
We want to thank all of the parents for everything they’ve done for us. Everything from running us to various sporting events, paying for our expenses, or lending us a vehicle on a Saturday night. Whether it was piling into trucks to go to a movie, loading up a suburban to go to a cabaret, or all packing in the Acadia for a road trip…they have always trusted us, or at least pretended to.
I would also like to thank our parents for being our biggest influences in our lives. They may not always understand, but they usually and I stress usually, love us even when we make it very difficult. Even though these difficult times they have taught us to work hard, coached us to be better people and have been proud of our accomplishments.
As we graduate today we hope we have and will continue to make you proud.
Now would everyone please raise their glasses to pay tribute to the parents who have been with us every step of the way.
Toast to the Staff
Hello everyone, I would like to thank most of you for coming. Staff, I understand you may be a little nervous that I was the one selected to write your toast, but not to worry you will only get what you had coming to you. Now before I start, I would just like to say, Ms. Rachul, a little advice for your reply, if people don’t laugh the first time you say it, DO NOT repeat it 5 more times in hopes that someone will chuckle. For my toast I have decided to come up with the 10 top things that you have taught us.
10. Make sure someone is standing by the door watching for the “teacher” to come back.
9. If we are getting yelled at, “talking” in a louder voice than the teacher is not acceptable.
8. Bumper cars on the slide can be very painful. Just ask Zach.
7. How to do burnouts in the rink parking lot. (As if we didn’t already know how to do that)
6. Check for new kids before you start screaming at us.
5. If you’re mad, we get it, you don’t have to break a door to prove it to us.
4. Burning Kleenex boxes and throwing them into the cupboards should only be done by a trained professional.
3. Urinals are meant for urine, just ask Zach.
2. If you’re gonna be dumb you gotta be tough.
1. they taught us how to care for one another.
All joking aside we appreciate everything you have done for us, and everything you have been to us. Please join me in toasting the staff.